Monday, March 02, 2009

Daily Kos...Liberal Opinions, Not Necessaily Accurate

In my Reader (I use Google), I subscribe to twenty or so information/news sources, including blogs. I read sports, finance, international news, US news, syndicated opinion writers and blogs. I am on the conservative side, obviously, but do read some liberal ones. One in particular is the Daily Kos (pronounced cause).

I have no problem with agreeing to disagree. One posting came up over the weekend that did not sit well with me. A blogger that goes by 'mofembot' posted a blog entitled "Learning about Sex... the Mormon way!."

Blogs are web logs, more often opinions than scientific fact (mine included). People can write what ever they want. Case in point, 'mofembot' has voiced her experience with Mormons and how they view sex -- she was involved with the Chruch as a youth so has a first hand account. What I take exception with is that she is claiming that is the norm - that Mormons have a weird take on sex.

Spin it how you chose but the church's stance on sex is detailed on the church's web site:
The law of chastity is the Lord’s law of personal purity. This commandment states that there must be no sexual intimacy, except between a man and a woman who have been legally and lawfully married. God knows that by following this law, we will have greater happiness and blessings and find deeper marital love in our families.
How this is taught to our youth, especially given the world in which we live in, is a challenge. In my experience, the more frank and open, the better.

Parents who have a good relationship more often than not also have a good sexual relationship. It is to be commended. Fidelity within marriage is a splendid thing.

There are great blessings for those who abstain prior to marriage. Personal commitment and integrity are core to a marriage founded on honorable principles.

One reason most Mormons who get married in the temple have short engagements is because they want to have sex. They have respect enough for one another and are willing to wait until the the wedding day. Hormones work in Mormons just like they do in Catholics, Baptists, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus and agnostics.

I have never seen written nor have I heard specifics about the sex act between a husband and wife. That does not mean people don't have and don't voice their opinions. About the best advise I have heard in this area is not to do something either party is not comfortable with. Pretty simple.

Many LDS people have not keep the law of chastity. That does not mean the Church is about to change is doctrinal stance. Sexually active teenagers is not a good thing (despite what some of them might claim). Sexual promiscuity has never been deemed a desirable trait, despite what Hollywood and the TV networks claim. Unmarried pregnancy, be it teen or other, has many negatives. Few would think group sex or spouse-swapping is a way to build a meaningful marriage.

It sounds like 'mofembot' has overcame her sheltered upbringing. There are plenty of LDS people that were not virgins prior to marriage that are doing okay today with respect to the Church. There are others that are not doing so good.

The best course is still abstinence prior to marriage and complete fidelity within. The Church has plenty of statistics to back this up.

'mofembot', thanks for posting. Others, realize this is one experience. Mine, as well as my wife's, is quite the opposite.


Doug & Laurel said...

Hi Hayes
I stumbled across your blog on LDS BLOGS. I thought you mighe be interested in a site my wife and I just built called, which uses simple, explanatory videos to explain the Mormon faith. Feel free to feature any of these videos on your blog, or just share them with non-member friends. We're hoping these videos will be missionary tools to help members share their beliefs. Anyway, sorry to spam your comments section. I couldn't find any contact information for you on your blog.

- Doug & Laurel

Hayes said...

Thanks Doug and Laurel.

mofembot said...

It's now 2.5 years later since my tongue-in-cheek post on DailyKos to which you refer. (I stumbled across your entry here today quite by accident.) Many LDS have certainly let me know that what I described (circulated privately, not just on dKos), was the norm for them as it was for me, growing up in So. Calif. in the late 1960s-early 1970s.

My poking fun of the cultural trappings of "chastity night" (pre-chewed gum and all the other unforgiving metaphors) is an oblique way of making a much more serious point — that the definition of morality within Mormonism has been largely and erroneously reduced to sexual purity rather than encompassing the whole of ethical or righteous behavior.

Over the years it has been my sad experience to learn that a surprising number of my friends and peers grew up in highly dysfunctional and abusive families — who all appeared very "normally LDS," at least on Sundays. As with so many victims of sexual abuse, most of these friends have carried with them an enormous burden of guilt for years, made all the worse by the extremely poor examples and metaphors about purity they grew up hearing. FWIW.